0 Celsius: To thaw a frozen heart novel Chapter 35

Insane love

Sapphire pov

Insane

That's what I hear people calling me behind my back

But when was I not insane.

Then when I came to know I was thrown away by my parent's into a bin.

Then when I didn't speak a word for a week when children at the orphanage bullied me.

Then when I slept for days under a tree or anything that covered my head and the passer-by’s just stared.

Or then when Andro left me after showing me what you mean by the word love.

Yes I was insane

And I am happy about it.

You know why?

Because that's what made me survive.

That's what made me realise that after everything I suffered I was still human.

A human with lost mind

But she is alive.

Breathing each second...

Seeing the only person I cared for caring for me in return.

Giving me everything he couldn't.

Trying his best in every way he could.

But he was too late.

I was gone now.

My sanity was lost and so were my emotions.

I was chaos

Both inside and out.

One minute I feel serene

The other I feel like breaking everything in the room.

One minute I adore his features with love and the other minute I feel like killing the girls who even dare to touch him.

One minute I feel I am normal

And the other those voices comeback

Haunting me every minute of day and night.

One minute I am normal

Another minute I am a psycho who doesn't even know what she is doing.

Right now I am staring at Andro's perfectly cut face.

He is asleep on the sofa facing me.

He looks tired

Tired of looking after me every second.

But he doesn't give up.

"He doesn't deserve you..!"

The voice said and I sighed..

I was expecting it..it doesn't leave me alone for a minute I swear.

"I know "

I said defeated and closed my eyes trying to get some sleep.

"Why don't you let him go? Why are you being selfish and making him suffer...just kill yourself and set him free you slut!!"

My anxiety attack was coming listening to the voice..

I tried placing my hands on my ears and taking long breaths

Breathe Saph Breathe!!

It's fine calm yourself.

I tried explaining myself but it was in vain...

"What happened Saph can't listen what's true!! I am telling you ...end this...end yourself and only then will I go...."

No...No...

I moved my body back and forth trying to get rid of the voice.

But as I moved my leg back I couldn't move..

I tried again but it felt like something was stopping me.

I looked down to see but there was nothing...

I couldn't help...

I screamed...

Screamed to set me free.

Screamed to end this nightmare.

Suddenly I felt something soft on my head.

I looked up to see Andro kissing my forehead while holding my face in his hands.

He pulled my hair out of my face and continued to kiss me everywhere.

"It's fine...I am here...it's fine"

He kept repeating as first he kissed my closed eyes taking away my tears.

Moving towards my nose ...them my cheeks and finally when he reached my lips he stopped.

I opened my eyes to see why he stopped.

But as soon as my eyes met his ..his lips next to my ears sending a shiver down my body.

"I want these innocent eyes to stare at me when I claim these lips."

He said placing his thumb on my lip and tracing it.

Gone was the voice

Gone was the fear

Instead a heat pooled between my legs and it burned down all my insecurities.

I stared at him unable to respond.

But I guess he expected this when he guided me all along

He kissed me

And I didn't respond.

Not because I didn't wanted to..

No but because a question entered my mind that froze my senses.

"Did I deserve him? Did he deserve a psycho orphan insane bipolar girl as his partner for life?

Did he deserved to suffer all his life just because he loved a psycho girl....

No he is wrong...

His choices are wrong....

I need to stop this...

I don't need him to die with me.

I want him to be happy.

He can't be happy if he keeps wasting his time on a gone case like me...

I stopped him by placing my hands on his chest and pushing him back

But he out rightly refused.

Instead his strong hands gripped my tiny fists and pushed them back leaving me completely at his mercy.

He refused to break the kiss as I refused to accept it.

"S...t...o..p..."